1. Sometimes doesn't eat a meal not because he forgets, but because he is lazy and doesn't want to cook or spend the effort digesting.
2. Makes up for point #1 by eating tons and tons of meat when he does eat. And when he is seemingly out of meat, he digs through the freezer to find potentially 8-month old meat. Then he eats that... raw.
3. Takes off his shirt when he gets home from work, and then proceeds to cook, eat, clean, and even do some housework, all the while remaining shirtless. Who cares if the hot oil gets on his skin, at least it's not on his favorite shirt.
4. Goes a minimum of two days before showering. There is no upper limit, nor should there be one. Also never closes the door when in the bathroom, why should he?
5. Never gets bored because he can always find something to occupy himself with whether it be watching Anime, playing video games, programming, grunting, flexing, or applying expensive face cream.
6. Thinks of the most disgusting things that he does and not only does he do it as often as he pleases, he writes about it in an effort to repulse the world with his actions. Why? Because he's a man.
7. Wonders to himself how any girl could possibly like him.
I'm at #1 right now.
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