There is No Such Thing as a Self-Made Man

I share my testimony a lot. I was told that it is an effective way to share the Gospel. Almost always, I share how I didn't grow up in a Christian family, how I was pretty much the first Christian in my family, and how coming to faith "by myself" stirred up a passion for evangelism within me. I used to "boast" that my faith is real because I had to even go against my own family (see here). I have even seen myself as a "self-made man" with regards to my faith. Well, nowadays, I share my story a bit differently.

Yes it's true that growing up, I was not a Christian and I practiced a mix of Buddhism and ancestral worship. It's also true that neither of my parents went to church, with my dad especially being strong on atheism. It's true as well that I went to a secular school while living in a Muslim country. It's especially true that when I first became a Christian, both my dad and my grandparents were upset with me.

However, my faith didn't just come from a vacuum. I am not a self-made man. God placed many things in my path that led me to where I am today.

My mom, even though she did not go to church, is the first Christian in the family. Her reasons for doing so is in large part due to family pressure. Since she knew how suffocating this pressure is, she bore it all for me so I wouldn't have to feel as much pressure either from her or from my extended family.

My mom, even though she didn't lead me to a saving faith in Christ, did teach me the importance of prayer. Ever since a young age, she's told my brother and me that prayer works, that we can ask God for anything.

My mom, even though she didn't read the Bible too much (again due to family pressures), did tell me a few Bible stories. At the time, I don't think I even knew they were Bible stories. But I'm sure seeds were planted.

My mom, even though we had many options, chose to put me in a Christian school after 9th grade in high school. This was my first systematic exposure to the doctrines of Christianity. It was also there (Dalat International School in Penang, Malaysia) that I someone shared the essentials of the Gospel with me.

My mom, even though I did not know it, prayed for me night and day. I know that it is due to her simple but persevering prayers that I am where I am today.

My mom (and dad), even though I did not ask for it, are our biggest financial supporters. Without them, we would not be able to do much ministry at all, let alone even sustain ourselves.

Last week, my mom and dad cam to visit us in Chicago. We planned a week-long birthday celebration for them.

The points is...

However crazy our testimonies may be, there is always someone behind the scenes who played a huge but often unacknowledged part. The "self-made man" idea is simply not true. We owe everything to others and everything owes its existence to God. Ephesians 2:8-9 says, "For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God."

So... Who is that person in your story? Who is the one who helped shape you into the person you are today? Write them a note of appreciation, and pray to God for them. Share your story with me too!

Tony, a Servant of Christ Jesus

I wrote the following for a class introduction for a seminary course.

My name is 莊智超 (Tony Chuang). I was born in Taiwan, grew up in Malaysia, and did my Bachelor’s in Computer Science in the States only to finish it in Canada. I grew up in a Muslim country, was raised in a Buddhist, idol worshipping family and if not for God's grace, that’s what I'd still be doing today. But instead here I am, completely in love with and consumed by my savior king (cf. Heb 12:29). In fact, God has saved me from both physical death and spiritual death in my conversion. My heavenly Father has since done such an amazing work in my family that both my parents have saving faith in Christ too (my mom being the first in the family). Praise God! His promises are true (cf. Acts 16:31)! My dad himself got baptized less than two months ago!

I’m not married. I’m a geek by nature, a programmer by trade, currently living in the suburbs of Toronto, and pursuing full-time (M.Div.) God’s calling in my life to be a pastor because I now cannot imagine another way of life. I simply must preach! This fire is too intense for me to hold in (Jer 20:9)! Likewise, Hellfire is too damning for any of us to hold the gospel in…

My favorite question is “Are you passionately in love with God right now?” My goal is to hear resounding yes’s from everyone I ask this to. The man who’s influenced me the most is Charles Spurgeon. Evangelism plays a huge role in my life. I’d do anything, ANYTHING (Rom 9:3), to see lost souls come to truly know Christ, especially my older brother. It is to that end I pray nonstop (cf. 1 Thess 5:17) and for that end I try to work harder than anyone (cf. 1 Cor 15:10).

I look forward to learning more tools in Hermeneutics 2 that will help me properly exegete the Bible. It is only through this everlasting Word (Psa 119:89) that anyone can be saved (Acts 4:12) and I must be able to wield this double-edged sword (Heb 4:12) as properly as possible if I’m to be a mighty instrument of God. In other words, I have very high expectations for what I’m to learn in this class. I know I am still lacking in so many spiritual things and I have much to learn still. However, this knowledge is not for me, but for the lost. Yet not for them either, but for Christ.

Like Hudson Taylor said, “If I had a thousand pounds China should have it- if I had a thousand lives, China should have them. No! Not China, but Christ. Can we do too much for Him? Can we do enough for such a precious Saviour?”

No, we can never do enough! But alas, even if I fail and fall flat on my face (as I so often do), I fall on His grace. And oh what amazing grace! Class, let us push forth together always in the Spirit (Eph 6:18) and ever by His grace (Eph 2:8a)!

Sharing the Cost in Evangelism

Amazing salvation story! Read it, share it, praise God for it!

To catch people up, I go out with a team of people to the local mall to evangelize every week. From my previous Facebook status update, you guys read about Raghulan, the guy from the mall who was agreeing with everything we said about God, sin, Hell, and the whole gospel. Two days ago he texted me "hey tony where can I get a copy of the bible?" I told him that I'd give him one and that we can meet up some time to do that. Additionally, he told me how he had a lot of questions for me.

Unbeknownst to me, God had already been working in his life prior to us meeting him at Markville. He had already been thinking about God a lot even though he came from a Hindu family. He had some pretty crazy things happen to him in the past few months. Anyway, that night we shared the gospel with him, he could not sleep well and even woke up in fear due to a terrible nightmare. Maybe we talked about judgement day (John 16:8) too much, just maybe. But that's one of the reasons he contacted me: he was afraid. But so was I when I first heard about Hell, and you should be too. When we met up, I asked what his questions were and he said, "I don't really have questions, I just want to hear more about what you were talking about." Yes! He just wants to hear more about Jesus Christ! So I told him more. I was not the one speaking that night (Matt 10:20), God kept showing me passage after passage of scripture and I just read to him, using as few of my own words as possible. We talked for a good long time as he also started asking questions and shared more of his story. When asked how he felt, he said "God is calling me." (Rom 11:29) When asked what was stopping him from being under the authority of God, he said "Nothing."

Hallelujah! I told him how he can pray right then and start that relationship. But before continuing, though the evangelist in me just wanted him to "pray the prayer" and "accept Christ," I knew he needed to be warned first. I spent much time telling him about my journey, about my grandparents' rejection of me (Matt 10:35), about the hardships (1 Pet 4:12), about how life does NOT get easier, about sanctification (Rom 6:19), about how he will have to give up stuff (Rom 12:2), about how the devil/world will hate him (1 John 3:13), about how being a Christian means being a slave of God (Rom 6:18), about the cost of following Jesus (Luke 9:58)... but lastly about how it's all so worth it (Phil 3:8) and about Heaven (Rev 22:4). I then asked again if he's still willing to give up control of his life over to God and to be His slave. He paused, thought for a bit, told me he was afraid, and then with an eagerness in his eyes, looked up and finally declared, "Yes."

And the prayer, oh the prayer. After we prayed together as he walked from darkness to light, he asked me, "Did you feel it?" I was confused for a bit but then he said, "This thing in my chest, this feeling. Ah, I can't describe it. Did you feel it too when you first prayed?" I proceeded to tell him about who the Holy Spirit is (John 14:16-17) and the concept of the trinity. He is now going to read the gospel of John and sometime next week we'll meet up to talk about it. If only you guys saw the look in his eyes, the joy he was exuding, the relief he felt, the sweet, sweet moment when he tasted the goodness of our savior for the first time. This is what I live for, the salvation of souls for God! If you've never felt this, I urge you now, win souls for Christ! God can use anyone! He used me!

Never in my evangelism have I warned someone so thoroughly and to tell them NOT to be a child of God. In fact, I told him to be a slave. Come on, who'd say yes to being a slave? It is foolishness (1 Cor 1:18)! But if you're called by God, it's the best thing ever. Never in my life have I understood irresistible grace so clearly. There was nothing I could say that would have turned him away from God. Friends, we don't have to try to make the gospel appealing, figure out a fancy way to get their attention, make sure they know God loves them, play the role of the nice friend who is always there, water down the gospel to make it simpler, or share cheap grace. This is what we must do in evangelism: we preach Christ crucified (1 Cor 1:23) and how we are to be crucified with Him (Gal 2:20). Yes, at its core it's still just faith in Christ, but never without the cost. And when we evangelize, if we are preaching this true gospel, God WILL work (Isa 55:11).

In summary, this is what happened: Christ looked at him and said, "Mine" (Phil 3:12b). All I did was go to the mall and open my Bible.

A Testimony about God and My Grandparents

Today, I have a testimony to share. I had shared this in many formats but am now writing this down in order to edify as many people as possible. This is a story about my unsaved family.

My grandparents hated Christians and didn't even want their kids or grandkids to have anything to do with church. They would physically look away and not listen when we were talking about God. This one time, some Christian friends came to visit and care for them, my grandpa actually looked straight up at the ceiling WHILE they were talking, talk about rudeness... Beyond this spiritual darkness, there were spiritual attacks from Satan as well. For my grandpa, every single time that he went to church, that same night he would have a nightmare about demons and evil spirits fighting him or holding him down on the ground. These dreams would get so intense that he sometimes woke up in the middle of the night and got violent with my grandma. It got so bad that he doesn't even want to be physically near a church building now. During the times we prayed, he would not listen, when we talked about Heaven and Hell, he would laugh, and at the mention of Jesus, he would scoff. My grandma on the other hand would simply laugh at me every time I talked about Jesus, saying I'm delusional for believing in the afterlife and that I'm 走火入魔 (in too deep in a demonic way). The gospel had been shared in full many times, from the showing of the law to the sinfulness of man to the desperate need of Jesus as Lord and savior.

I don't need to tell you guys that spiritual warfare is real. And this is what had been going on in my house for the past four months, with my older brother too who is not too unlike my grandpa (in his rejection). I tried preaching the full, unadulterated truth of the gospel to them and they turned away. I tried loving them unconditionally and being the best example of Christ I possibly could and they ignored it. I tried fasting and praying on my knees many times a week, crying out for God's intercession, and sometimes I felt like He wasn't answering.

What made it worse was how much I love my family. I love them so much. I love them more than any other human relationship I have. I love them with the love of Jesus Christ. If I could die so that they might be saved, I would. If I could pluck out my eyes so that they can see Jesus how I see Him, I would. They are drowning, dying, and I cannot do anything... I could only watch them die... And that's what they are doing now. God has shown me very clearly that it is He alone who has the power to save. Nothing I do, no matter how "right" they are and how "strategically sound" they might be can amount to anything if God chose not to work in that way at that time.

But praise be to God, the joy of my salvation and the uplifter of souls! When we realize that it is God alone who works (Psalm 62:1), He starts working. When we continue our responsibility in sowing the seed and then do nothing else but sleep (Mark 4:26-27), God makes it grow. When we stop thinking that somehow our efforts would "inspire" God to act and realize that any action on His part is by His grace and nothing else (Eph 2:8-9), that's when God shows up.

My grandparents live in Taiwan, and I'm in Canada. The fact that they were even here for four months was an amazing opportunity. Just a month or two ago, when they still didn't want have anything to do with God, they came to church! In fact, they were adamantly against going on the previous night. Then, through the petition of the saints on bended knees, we saw a complete change of heart within a few hours! I have so many more of these God stories in just the past four months I could share but this post would get way too long. Just know that for 81 years of their life, they had never went to church, been part of worship, prayed with people, or heard the full gospel. And this all happened this summer! Praise God! Praise God!

Last week when my brother left, as we were sitting in the car at the airport, as I shared how much he means to me and how much I wanted him to see Jesus clearly, right before we were about to pray, tears started forming at his eyes. I've only seen him like this twice in my life. God was tugging at his heart and it is so evident! Bob, if you're reading this, God is calling out to you right now! How can you deny it any longer? It's not family you miss or need, it's Jesus! Read your Bible, pray, and meet your savior! Sorry about sharing this in public, you'll be fine.

This week, not to share any details, I was devastated by my grandpa's hardness of heart. And it broke mine. I had to lay it all before the throne of God above because my heart could not take it anymore. I had to stop trying so hard and doing so much and simply trust that God's word does not go out in vain. I even had to lay my grandpa's life on the altar, saying that his salvation (or lack thereof) does not change a thing about my affection for Christ. It was one of the hardest things I've had to do.

The next day, after prayer, the same thing that happened to my brother happened to my grandpa. The thing is, during the whole prayer I was sharing about the love of Christ and how they need it so badly. The Holy Spirit led me to rebuke them! Instead of getting angry, my grandpa, who I've never seen tear up in my entire life, was doing all he could to hold back his tears. My grandpa, who had never held my hand, not even to cross the road when I was a kid, could not let go of my hand after prayer. This was God at work!

My Christian friends, you may know all these things. You may know how only God saves. But I am praying that this truth will impact you more today than it ever did. When we experience spiritual oppression of this level, we don't stop trying when we see how our methods are ineffective. We keep trying as long as we are with them, waiting for God to work, however long it may take. And when we are not with them, we pray unceasingly. And throughout it all, we trust in God not to do what we ask, but to do what is good. That is the secret to evangelism: To fully work and fully rest at the same time. The gospel is disgusting and the fragrance of death to those who are perishing. But once God flicks that switch, you can be doing and saying the exact same things, but your unsaved friend will be on his knees, begging God to forgive him, smelling life for the first time.

Is that not where you were when you met Jesus for the first time? On your knees, broken, but knowing you've finally found what you've been searching for? Do you remember the beauty of your savior when you first laid eyes on Him and the smile on His bloodied face? Can you recall more clearly what was shared at your conversion or rather the overwhelming weight of sin and the unsurpassable desire for Christ? That feeling was the Holy Spirit! The Spirit's working can and WILL overwhelm any of your efforts. It was by GRACE you have been saved! Shall we "stop working" so that grace may abound? By no means! Do you remember what you were when you were called? Can you think back on how much God has changed you since then? Do you not think that what the gospel did in you, it can do to your friend/family? Yes! Yes, God Is mighty to save.

And if you can't remember any of these things, you need to repent right now. Beg for Jesus to forgive you. Know in your heart that whatever you had before was of man and not of God. Ask for a new heart of flesh and new eyes of faith. Then open those eyes, and look! Look up, for Christ is waiting for you with open arms. Oh run to Him, run to our blessed savior! And know that then He will give you rest for your soul.

My Dad

God is not a concept. Nor is He a crutch for those unable to get by life on their own. And He is definitely not this mysterious, false entity that humans attribute to things they can't explain. He is someone we can have a relationship with and can get to know. He is Jesus and He is real. This is not a post to defend God or to convince people to believe, but only to retell what had happened. This is the story of how my dad came to know God, told from the perspective of a son who has craved this since he first believed.

My dad was Buddhist in the overwhelmingly traditional Taiwanese household he grew up in, turning agnostic and accepting of all religions as he started to think for himself. He was a realist, only facing only problems that arose in front of him, things that occur in everyday life. His spiritual state remained thus for many years, that is until he met the only Christian in my household: my mom. The thing is, his parents hate Christians; so much that my mom was not allowed to go to church or talk about Jesus after they got married. My mom however has always told my dad how she would pray for him and how the God she knows can help in many situations. My dad was still agnostic at this point, but really just listening to everything she said but responding to nothing.

From my conversations with him, he was adamant that we humans are the ones who, with our willpower, wills things to happen. And he refused anything I said about God being real and always referred to God as a human construct. Granted I didn't have a lot of time with him because shortly after I became a Christian, I left for the States. But still, my memories of him was of someone who would deny God to his grave, not a whole lot unlike my brother.

I know little else about what my mom has told my dad all these years, but I know what I told him three years ago. Most of you may already know this, but I used to be a student at Georgia Tech. Due to certain circumstances, I had to leave not just the school, but the country too. This was after three and a half years at that university and it sucked, a lot. I might go into more detail just how much this devastated me later, but the focus is on my dad right now. So three years ago, after God broke and remade me, I started fervently witnessing to my dad. At that time, I've been away to school and away from home for so long it almost felt alien to be living in the same house my parents lived in. My dad still never went to church with me the whole year I was with him but God's word was spoken in the house a lot.

In 2009, when I was in the airport ready to leave for Canada, my dad and I sat in McDonald's eating overpriced Big Mac's. I started telling him how much God meant to me and how real I think he is. I urged him to reconsider God and to ask my mom about it if he has any questions. This would probably be the last time my whole family lived together under the same roof, and I wanted my farewell to mean something. Later on that year I found out from my mom that my dad has been going to church, that he has even said things like "快點, 每次教會都遲到!" ("Hurry up, we're always late for church!") I was in Montreal at that time and I remember crying a bit then. My dad was going to church, and not just once or twice, but consistently!

Every once in a while my mom would tell me updates about how my dad is doing spiritually and it's always exciting to hear things like "We were praying for you today". The fact that he is even praying with my mom means that he's talking to God. He's seriously considering Christianity? The God conversation at the airport stuck? I didn't know what to think and that's when I remembered a prayer I made at Georgia Tech. I used to do Bible studies with my parents there and after one of those, I remembered being brought to my knees, tears streaming down my eyes and praying to God:

"God, you know my heart. You know how much I want this. Even my D-group members know this. I pray, I beg of you: Save my dad. I don't care what it takes. I don't care if I have to give up everything. I don't care if I have to leave the school and all my academics for my dad. I'd rather not have to die but God, if that's what it takes, so be it. Save him God..."

It went something like that, but longer and much less intelligible. God had answered my prayer. Without what had happened to me in the States I would not have had the opportunity to witness so much to him in Malaysia. And my family would not be in Canada now, my dad would not be going to church every week. If my grandparents found out, they'd be so pissed, probably a lot more pissed than when I refused to worship an idol. The work He was doing in my dad's heart was awesome and almost miraculous. Thinking back now, I totally underestimated God. You see, about a month ago, my dad accepted Christ.

My dad is saved! He is now a Christian! I'll be able to see him again in Heaven!

I went around to a lot of people just telling them the news. It was just that exciting. Now I'm just sitting in the living room, typing out all this and being reminded of just how awesome it is that my dad is a Christian. I've prayed, I've begged, I've wept for my dad for eight years. And it was way too long. I can't even imagine what it's like for my mom who has been doing it for much longer. But I do know that God is faithful, just looks at Acts 16:31. I know a lot of you has loved ones out there who refuses to believe and might even hate God. But I know for a fact that my God is mighty to save. He saved me and now my dad. You are no exception.

Original: http://tcfish.blogspot.com/2011/05/my-dad.html